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The Talk

I think I’m going to get the talk soon. I can tell. Because my mum keeps hinting that she thinks that I have a boyfriend. Even though I have told her on numerous occasions that I do not, in fact, have a boyfriend. But she doesn’t ever seem to believe me. So I think I’m going to get the talk.

But you see, the problem is, that I’m worried I’m going to laugh. Because my mum has never given me the talk before so I am very worried she’s going to go in detail. I mean, she has tried in the past to give me the talk but I stopped her in her tracks. I basically told her about my sex ed classes and walked away slowly. But this time, I think I have to let her give me the talk. Or the alternative will be that I get to about 30 and she still hasn’t given me the talk. And, knowing her, she will try to. And I will have to go through that. And it will be horrible. Honestly, I just don’t want to go through that embarrassing ordeal when I’m much older. I rather now than later.

Oh, I’ve gone slightly off track. The problem is laughing. I’m the kid who will laugh when a teacher unexpectedly says the word sex. And I’m a bloody loud laugher. It’s a shame really because I was always quite a quiet child that could somehow produce the most atrocious laugh. And I will laugh in her face when she says it even though I know it’s one of those serious talks.

I mean, my nervousness won’t help either, if I’m quite honest with you. I laugh when I’m nervous also. Which really does help with interviews but not with serious conversations. Trust me, I have laughed enough times during serious conversations and it has gotten me into enough trouble.

Sigh.

My point is, I’m going to get the talk, I’m going to laugh and I’m going to get in trouble. Yay me (!)

What a way to end the week.

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